Thursday, January 8, 2015

Not all IPPY Award Winning Books...


Are equal. 

I shlepped this non-tome (Google the definition, I'm right) from the Mainland to Kauai. I can only judge it based upon the trail descriptions provided within its pages. (None of the other topics interest me). This literary drivel could be equivalent to the guidebook the infamous Donner Party used en route to the California coast, minus the cannabalism. 

I hiked the Powerline Trail today. Here's the info: "the trail is an old dirt road." Well, not so much as you can tell from the photo. Not only are the descriptions inaccurate, they are possibly dangerous if you follow the author's lame advice.

Take for instance, the use of flip-flops for river crossings. Is Mr. Doughty high? You and your sandals might be on a one way swim to the Pacific Ocean. The flip-flops won't be the ones screaming out for help though.
He also advises dumping water to save weight on the uphill slogs. (I won't toss drinking water until there is a faucet within reach).
He never mentions the squatters taking up space in his Na Pali Wilderness hike description. I did!
http://jeffsambur.blogspot.com/2014/12/occupy-na-pali.html

Check out the 4X4 who lost the Happy Hour "I dare you to drive your Toyota on the Powerline trail." There's probably three other vehicles beneath it.

I included a photo of a well-written, entertaining, informative and accurate IPPY gold medal winning book. 
BTW, this exciting travelogue can be found on Amazon. I hear the author has become a blogger. 

Good night from Kapaa,
Jeff 






Tuesday, January 6, 2015

The Hawaiian Kings weren't Snowbirds...


They were Rainbirds!

 A fun Aloha State factoid: The old time Kauai Kings performed an annual migration within the island. In the winter they would escape the wetter, cloudier and cooler land mass near Wailua and head southwest toward dry and toasty Waimea.

And here I thought the Jews of the US were the originators of human seasonal migrations. 
Another Urban Legend shattered.

To be honest, I'm still amazed (after three weeks of being here) that there can be so much variation in weather on a speck of land 25 miles long by 33 miles wide. Isn't the Edmonton Shopping Mall of Alberta, Canada larger eh? 

Warm and dry is better than cold and wet,
Cheers!
Jeff


Monday, January 5, 2015

Hawaii's First Haole...


Captain James Cook. 

In January 1778, Cook and his crew from the HMS Resolution and Discovery made landfall in Waimea, Kauai. The explorer, navigator, cartographer and the Boss who kept his sailors scurvy-free named the archipelago the Sandwich Islands after the Earl and the First Lord of the Admiralty. (OK. He might have been a suck-up too.)

His crew restocked the ships with water, sweet potatoes, taro and other foodstuffs. They probably left behind rats, lice and a few social diseases. (Supposedly Hawaiian women were "easy".)

The good Captain went galavanting around the Pacific Ocean only to return to Hawaii in February 1779. Once again, there was a need to re-provision and repair the ships. 

The Captain and his horny crew might have desired a little nookie too. 

 This time they were anchored off the Big Island. This visit wasn't peace, love and happiness. Tensions arose when items from the ships went missing. There were threats and counter-threats. When the macho chest-thumping was over Captain Cook was doing the Dead Fish float in Kealakekua Bay. 

Obviously Captain Cook never heard the old adage. What do guests and fish have in common? After awhile they both start to stink. 

That'll learn 'em. 

Good night,
Jeff


Sunday, January 4, 2015

The Kooky Trail...


The real name is Kukui but I'm worthless when it comes to the Hawaiian language. With only eight consonants, the words look and sound pretty similar to my "Haole" (white guy) eyes and ears. 

So...the 2,000 foot drop toward  the Waimea River didn't seem all to bad. 
The best part was meeting up with Mr. Jackson. This gentleman/hunter is nine decades worth of inspiration. 
Once I got him to confess to his age, I asked a lot of questions.
Here's our conversation.

Haole: How much does a wild pig weigh around here?

Mr Jackson: About 100 pounds.

Haole:  How much does it dress out to be? (Meaning how much pork)

Mr. Jackson: About 40 pounds.

Haole: Are you able to carry it out?

Mr Jackson: Do you see anyone else around?

I now have a new Hawaiian Hero.

Mahalo/Thank You Mr Jackson.

Most folks are true wimps (including this Haole) compared to you.
May you live longer and prosper.


Aloha/Good Morning...

From the Wandering. Wondering Jew.

Mahalo,
Jeff

Looks like it'll be a good day to go out and get muddy on the Kooky Trail. At least that's the way I  say it.

http://www.kauaiexplorer.com/hiking_kauai/kukui_hike.php

Anyone care to join me?

Saturday, January 3, 2015

You meet the nicest people...


at the Olympic Cafe's Friday Free Taco Happy Hour!

Look who paddled their Ark over from yonder Princeville in the three inch/minute deluge?
It's that lovable couple from Carbondale, Colorado, Jim Jim and Martha. 

They are celebrating their Honeymoon on Kauai. Don't they make a cute pair?

I believe this union will stand the test of time. 

Cheers to them and thanks for the brews!
It was the most conversation I've had since I arrived in Hawaii over two weeks ago.
Its a couples world out there.


Sunny today. Perfect for a stroll along the beach. I'll wait until manana for the mud to return to solid form in the rain forest. 

Mahalo,
Jeff


Friday, January 2, 2015

My newest Hawaiian Home...


Well, for the next eight nights.

Yep, all the comforts of Barley the Van minus the wheels and engine.

These days the concept of "Home" is wherever my Nalgene bottle, beer, backpack, book, I Pad, coffee and cup are. I'll include a bag of muddy clothes requiring a wash too. 

From the sodden suburbs of Kapaa, (Did I mention, it rains often here?)
Jeff