I'm Popeye the Sailor Man...

Ahoy Matey! 

With all the Humpback action going on off shore, I had to go in for a closer gander.

So with the aid of two Dramamine, I ventured into the Heart of the Ocean. Well, not exactly but it sounds more exciting that way. 

OK. I'll say it, the experience was almost, ALMOST as good as sex. Although, I've never medicated myself with Dramamine before performing the deed. 

For the cetaceans, it is all about mating. The males are sparring one another constantly. I suppose the ultimate winner gets the blubbery babe. Most of the heavy thumping occurs below the surface. When one Ultimate Full Contact fracas surfaced, we saw one stud-wannabe with fresh blood oozing from his tail. (No, I didn't dog paddle in and try to break the combatants apart). 

At one point, a crew member inserted a sonar device into the saltwater so we could hear the gangs taunts and threats.
Here are some of the snippets we picked up.

Male Whale One: "Dude! Your Mom wears Scuba Flippers!"

Male Whale Two: "Oh yeah! I saw your Mom make it with a guppy! She liked it too!"

You get the drift. Kind of like a late night bar scene without the beer flowing. 

I've attached the best shots. Enjoy them and light up a cigarette after.

Once again, I am so glad they escaped extinction.

Read all about it. 

http://jeffsambur.blogspot.com/2015/01/humpback-whales.html

PS. Just like Popeye, I do eat my spinach. 

No Olive Oyl sightings in Lahaina.

Good Night Mainland.

After two days of coughing like...

a West Virginian coal miner, I said screw this curtailment of activities. If I'm going to hack up a few capillaries, I might as well be engaged in doing something I enjoy doing like shopping-NOT. 

So I headed for the hills. Somehow I stumbled upon the Mahana Trail which is near the posh, hoity-toity hotels. In fact, the resorts maintain the trail. This morning, I saw a maintenance worker vacuuming the dirt surface. It was the best maintained trail I've been on in Hawaii. The hotels even provide shuttle service to the top so gravity does the work for their guests. For an extra few bucks, they can hire a Sherpa. 

Since I wasn't part of the "In Crowd" I ascended and descended the baker's dozen worth of miles. I didn't mind, it was beautiful, cool and quiet. The good news is I feel better than I've felt in the nine days since learning of VOG. 

http://jeffsambur.blogspot.com/2015/01/caught-up-in-vog-of.html

When I picked up an inhaler for my lungs, the friendly pharmacist said, "that's volcanic air pollution. It even has gaseous metals in it." 

No wonder I could hear "Clank!" when I stopped suddenly. 

With a nose like mine, I take in and expel a lot of air. Probably the same volume of what inflates the Goodyear Blimp. Yep! That's a lot of hot air coming and going from a little guy like me. I require clean air to run smoothly and efficiently. Don't we all?

Stay healthy and keep moving,

Jeff

PS. That's a Norfolk Island Pine I'm embracing. This specimen got a lot bigger than the ones I used to grow in flower pots. 

Be the 10,000th Pageview of...

"A Wandering, Wondering Jew" and you can be a winner!

Soon my blog will hit a milestone. I have no idea what a Pageview means, but 10,000 of anything is nothing to cough at. (Which I'm still doing). 

So...here's the rules of the contest. At the bottom of a post, (scroll all the way down past the Top Ten posts) you'll notice big, black and bold numbers. That's the Pageview counter. Whatever those are. When you see it turn 10,000 contact me at jeffsambur@gmail.com to claim your prize.

And what's the prize? Why Happy Hour and dinner with me of course. 

This will be my 4th handout of goodies. For a website that hasn't even scored me one, "Hey Jeff! I love your blog, lemme buy you an IPA." this doesn't make smart business sense. Somehow, I doubt if Zuckerberg had a Facebook contest like mine. 

But what the heck, it's a slow news day here in balmy Lahaina. (Which happens to have a lot of shopping.) and I'm curious about how this will turn out.

Here's the posts from the previous contests.

http://jeffsambur.blogspot.com/2014/12/you-must-enter-to-win-the.html

http://jeffsambur.blogspot.com/2014/12/and-winners-of-the_20.html

No cheating! Remember what our parents said, "Honesty is the best policy." 

A wise man once told me, "when you speak the truth, your story never has to change." 

True!

Thanks for coming along BTW.

Jeff