This is a PSA

Pika Survival Announcement.

Shalom! This is Shlomo the Pika. A few of you may recall when Jeffy profiled me in this (see below) WW J  blog. It was my fifteen seconds of fame. (We Americans have a short attention span.)

https://jeffsambur.blogspot.com/2021/10/acuweather-fahgettaboudit.html

 Jeffy was kind enough to paw over his I Pad so you get this straight from a pika’s kop (Yiddish for head). We Ochotona princeps are in the high altitude trenches of climate change. At times we’re struggling with toasty temperatures which can make us plotz! We don’t need additional external tsuris in our lives. OY! We have plenty.

So here’s the sad Megillah of “The Murder of Melvin the Marmot.

(There's a lesson in this somewhere for those who still care.)

On a popular trail up to a Colorado 14’er, my landsmen and I were making hay in preparation of the winter season. We live in a splendid shtetl (with views) where we all get along. Our marmot and chipmunk neighbors are fine vegetarian mammals too. One big happy mishpocha. 

One early morning, we were deep into harvesting mode. (That is after a few cups of espresso). From the periphery of our shtetl, the Pika early warning squeaks began. 

“Incoming! Incoming! A BFD (Big Freaking Dog) is heading our way. Owner is nowhere in sight. ETA. SOON! Run and hide!” 

Which is what we did, dropping our loads of vegetative material. We took flight. 

Alas, our mensch neighbor Melvin the Marmot wasn’t fluent in Yiddish tinged Pika-ese. He was too slow  (Honestly Mel was zaftig from all those treats some hikers pitched him.) He didn’t stand a chance. Melvin was bowled over by the BFD. There was teeth gnashing, some cur noshing and awful screams. Hikers hustled over to rescue Melvin. But by then it was too late. 

One brave hiker, pulled the mongrel off Melvin’s still warm, bloody mangled mess of a body. Then the hikers started to yell.

“Whose dog is this? Where’s the owner?” 

Eventually the canine caretaker (we’ll call her Ms. C for Clueless) emerged into the same time zone of her pika pest. The crowd verbally jumped her. 

“Your dog killed a marmot! Why wasn’t it on a leash or by your side? We’re guests here. These animals live here! WTF!”

There was no marmot murder remorse from this New Agey hiker. She looked dreamily up into the blue sky, placed the back of her hand on her forehead and made the lamest excuse ever.

“It’s OK! The carcass will feed the crows, ravens and the coyotes. There’s no waste with Mother Nature.” 

Which understandably produced a chorus of “F—K YOU!” 

Eventually, the tumult died down. Hikers proceeded on past Melvin. Ms. Clueless contained her blood thirsty hound to just one Zip Code away.

My clan went back to farming, but with a little less bounce in each step.

At the end of the day, my landsmen Pikas gathered around Melvin’s stiff and cold body. We recited the Mourner’s Kaddish. Then we began shiva. (The seven days of mourning for the deceased.) We all knew we could have easily been in that meshuggeneh canine’s mouth without our early warning system. 

Ms. Clueless was right on one thing though. Within a few weeks, there was little left of Melvin besides his bones.

If you aren’t Clueless, here’s the Talmudic lesson. Please keep your dog on a leash or train them so well, your fir babies are velcroed to your side. In this way, humanoids and canines will be good wildland guests. Not guests from Hell. It’s all part of the “Leave No Trace” principles.

Thank you for taking the time to read this.

Shlomo the Pika

BUT! Before I lose your attention, I’m happy to announce that Jeffy has been inducted into the “Righteous Among The Pikas Hall of Mensches” Trust me we don’t give these out in a frivolous manner. They are earned. It was Jeffry’s second pika post that put him over the top.

https://jeffsambur.blogspot.com/2022/07/as-i-ponder-paucity.html

We celebrated Jeffy’s induction in a casual manner. (After all he’s still a minimalist) Veggie pizzas and IPAs (Idaho Pika Ale) were enjoyed by all.

Here’s our award winner’s brief speech. Like the man himself, it was honest, straightforward and direct from his heart. No bupkis tawk here.

“I’ll start this tawk with a Yogi Berra quote. “I just want to thank everyone who made this day necessary!” 

This is truly an honor for me. Seeing you guys in the High Country creates an instant smile for me. I’ll keep doing my part to get the word out to make people aware of your plight. For me and many other Pika fanatics the world would be a less joyful place without you. I love you little guys. You’re small, hermit-like, energetic and adorable. Like me!”

Last photos: Jeffy at his induction ceremony and the venue. (Pikas are the runts of all rabbits.)