Caught up in the VOG of...

Maui. 

On yesterday's Haleakala hike, I felt out of sorts. I was lacking my usual vim and vigor even after my multi-gallon caffeine fix. Sore throat, itchy eyes and other "Oh! Crap! I'm catching a freaking cold" like symptoms. 

At the midway point of my ramble, I took a lunch break and chatted up with a couple of locals. I made mention of my maladies in conversation.

Here's what one said.

"Dude! You got VOG."

"What? I stay away from dirty toilet seats and sick people. What is it anyway?"

"You get it from breathing bad air after a volcanic eruption. The Big Island has been active and it drifts over here eventually." 

So when I returned to Wifi Land I Googled it.

Straight from Wikipedia. (This is why I donate to them).

 Vog contains chemicals that can damage the environment, and the health of plants, humans and other animals. Most of the aerosols are acidic and of a size where they can remain in the lungs to damage the lungs and impair function. Headaches, watery eyes, sore throat, breathing difficulties (including inducing asthma attacks), flu-like symptoms, and general lethargy are commonly reported. 

So...This is what I say. Please Pele the Goddess of Fire, take a break. I need a dose of clean air.

Here's to a VOG free day for all,

Jeff

"One of These days Jeffie...

Bang! Zoom! Straight to the Moon."

My apologies to Ralph Kramden (from the classic TV show "The Honeymooners") for stealing his line.

I turned inland today or as the locals call it, "Up Country" to Haleakala National Park. The NPS claims it's a dormant volcano (last kaboom 1480-1600) but who's to say when Pele the Goddess of Fire throws her next tantrum. 

The crater is BIG: seven miles across by two miles wide and half-mile deep. Today, it was sunny with little wind. While I tramped along the bottom zone. It felt like being on the business side of a cast iron skillet. With a little olive oil anointing,  I would have been sizzling like chicken fajitas. 

Unless you have my "40 Years in the Desert" skin genes, bring vats of sunscreen. Thank You! Moses for granting me my dark skin pigment. 

It was way cool, despite being way toasty. 

It kept me out of the shopping malls too.

Shop Happy

Jeff

Like! there's totally so...

much shopping here in Maui. I'm beginning to think the Valley Island nickname came from those lovable and materialistic California Valley Girls.

Eventually I extricated myself out of the Lahaina Mall to do a little sight-seeing.

After all (for me) a day without clothes shopping is like a day without sunshine. 

I passed the glitzy beach resorts and found Waiawhile Blowhole. Well, Wait-A-While is really not its name, but this is no Old Faithful geyser when it comes to reliability.

Luckily, I was able to fit this event into my BUSY schedule. 

It's time for a brew and then back to the Mall. I heard Tommy Hilfiger is like having a sale. Bitchin'!

Happy Shopping!

Jeff

One Island Down...

Two to GO!

It's been over a month since I arrived on the "Garden Island" of Kauai. 

Once it stopped raining, it's been tubular! I can see how locals fall into the Island Time Zone. People move slower here.  It might be the Maui Wowie Ganga they smoke in these parts, or it might be the basic "Hang Loose! Hawaii" attitude. Whatever it is, I like it.

Speaking of Maui, that's my next island. A lot more people, 150 square miles of more space and one National Park. I told Brother Mike and bestest sister-in-law Robin, I would provide Shepa service on the "Valley Island" if they find a hike to their liking. It's the least I could do for them. 

Good night Kauai, 

Like Arnold Schwarzenegger said, "I'll be back!"

My arms were so fatigued...

after my first kayak experience, I didn't have the strength to pick up an IPA.

Brother Mike came to my rescue once again. Now you see why I call him my hero? 

There I was on the Mighty Hanalei River shooting the rapids, beating the piranhas back and bailing like a banshee to stop the boat from swamping. Well, not exactly, but it sounded exciting. Didn't it?

Truthfully, I got sore and stiff in body regions I wasn't even aware I owned. Who knew muscles live underneath your armpits.

It was fun and peaceful and I would do it again. Next time though, I'll carry aspirins.

Sleep well,

Jeff 

Be aware of Kikaheinie Peak...

No, that's not the name of this whoop ass mountain. It's a trail named after an Hawaiian liquor-Okolehao. The official hike ain't no biggie, it's what comes after that makes it special. 

From the "TahoeSux" blog: 

Disclaimer and Warning

It’s unlike me to put a warning and disclaimer in anything that I write about.  The entire TahoeSux blog is devoted to outdoor adventures that carry risk.  It’s up to the individual to do their own risk assessment.  Having said that, the “advanced version” of the trail is quite strenuous and potentially dangerous.  Here are my warnings for the awesome, epic, and totally worthwhile second half of the ‘Okolehao trail.

Don’t do the second, more advanced version of the hike if:

You considered the first half difficult.  The first half is a walk in the park compared to the second half.

If you have any fear of heights or vertigo.  Portions of the trail are a little over a foot wide along a volcanic spine with a drop on both sides (awesome!).

You absolutely need the fixed ropes to get up and down.  Some of them are sketchy and rotting, and not to be relied on until you’ve seen what they are anchored to.

You aren’t comfortable clamboring up and down steep (near vertical in parts) sections of trail in slippery mud via roots and rocks.

You have to talk your girlfriend/boyfriend/husband/wife into the hike.  Don’t bring anyone who isn’t stoked to be there.

There is heavy rain. Parts of the trail are slick even without rain.

The Kauai Revealed guidebook has this to say about the second half of the trail: “nasty, scary, hard core, and death-defying make that a must-miss alternative.”

It's pretty standard of me to be light on the research when I take off to explore in the morning. This one caught me ill-prepared. Only one liter of water for a sweat provoking ordeal. This full body work out bonked me 500 feet below the summit. Ahh-hah! Out of my pack came the Jewish equivalent of two Cliff bars, three Powerbars and and at least four bananas. 

What you ask is this magic manna? A bagel with Jif Peanut Butter and blueberry preserves of course. After the carbo fix, the peak was do-able. 

With all the bobbing and weaving, ups and downs on the narrow ridge lines, the elevation gain seemed Everest-like (minus the Sherpas, crevices and White Death.)

There's a few trail condition shots (note the rope), a pretty flower, and a once clean T-shirt ready for the rubbish bin.

Ain't retirement great? 

Going Native...

It didn't take long for my intrepid family members to start to hang loose in Kauai. Talk about fast learners.

Tomorrow they will go on a whale watching cruise while I go for a hike. I can't keep their "Go! Go! Go!" pace up. I'm only human, I need some rest. 

Besides, I get seasick in a bathtub. I don't want to be the passenger tossing "chum" to the cetaceans. Those humpbacks have to deal with enough pollution without me fouling the waters around them. 

Speaking of whales. I saw the Michael Jordan of humpbacks today at a nearby beach. This dude leapt out of the saltwater a few times in about a minute. I'm not sure if he could slam dunk, but from my vantage point he appeared to make all the right moves. Score!

This sure beats winter,

Good night from balmy Princeville,

Jeff