Happy Hour with Pikas.

“When this old world starts getting me down… (“Up on the Roof” lyrics by Gerry Goffin)

I find a paradise up, up into the rarefied air where trees and Texans don’t dwell. It’s here where I’m offline avoiding the daily scourge of the Grifter/Corrupter/Shit-Stirrer in Chief’s latest assault on Democracy. Far away from Merica’s newest “Endless War” which never had the blessings of Congress nor the majority of Merican people.

But enough of that! Let’s tawk scenery! Let’s tawk Trail Angeling! But most of all LET’S TAWK PIKAS!

I know a place which has all three. So I point Sanctuary One skyward just past dawn on rough 4X4 roads before the annoying ATV/OHV crowd hits the dirt and dust. If all goes well, I’m at my destination in time to create a breakfast before the first Colorado Trail and Continental Divide Trail hikers amble by. 

This year, my timing was spot on. Veggie and egg breakfast burrito ingested just before the first group of hungry hikers arrived. 

“Hi! I’m Jeff. Wanna PB&Boysenberry sandwich?” Thats my ice breaker. 

Before I knew it. I was BUSY! Whipping up five sandwiches untouched by human hands for the masses. Down they sat munching away while I blathered on about pikas, politics, history, unleashed dogs and various other issues I have strong opinions about. They were kind enough to laugh at my inane comments. 

Eventually the hikers got the chance to speak. They were well educated, interesting and for the most part young. They gave me hope in these low points of UFC “manosphere” spectacles on the White House lawn. Which the late Senator John McCain referred to as “human cockfighting.” 

(Can Merican values sink any lower than the Marianas Trench? Only time will tell but I believe with this current Bowel Movement. YES!)

So I thanked Danika, Goodwill, Mike, Emily and so many others for their graciousness in being respectful to an alter kaker. (Yiddish for curmudgeon). 

BUT! Not all hikers are created equal. A mother and daughter pair from North Carolina came through. I handed the daughter two sandwiches.  One for the her and one for the woman who went through child labor. Before I could say “gluttony” the daughter inhaled the calories while her Mom looked on in disbelief. Neither said thank you either. Parting with them was NOT sweet sorrow. 

At this point I was ready for my primary reason to be there. (Besides the incredible hikes, serenity and views). It was HIGH time for Happy Hour with the pikas. 

After grabbing my camp chair and a 9% 19.2 ounce DIPA, I chose a comfy spot on the edge of a BIGLY talus field. Then I followed Yogi Berra’s sage-like advice. “You can observe a lot by watching.” So that’s what I did for two incredibly enjoyable evenings. 

This is what I discovered:

A) Pikas are nimble. I saw one Superpika leap a two foot gap from one pointy rock to another. He/she nailed the landing. No stumbles or wavers. I stood up and applauded.

B) Pikas are athletic. They are able to sprint uphill over uneven terrain at altitudes where water boils at 189 degrees F. I got winded just by watching.

C) Pikas are territorial. Sure there’s a lot of dramatic chase scenes between talus owners and trespassers. But never a Pika version of a UFC barbaric event. Take notice  Imperialist Warmonger #47.

D) Juvenile pikas slither/skitter along while the grownups flat out run. 

E) Pikas are capable of chillin’. I saw three evenly spaced pikas in a row merely hanging out on their pointy perches. The distance was approximately 30 feet between each neighbor and probably their territorial borderlines. Not a great distance but if you’re the size of a large Russet potato it must feel like Alaska.

F)  Pikas are empathetic. The longer I sat, (My second IPA is a mere 7% 12 ounce variety) the closer my fur buddies would approach. Finally I had a close encounter of the fifth kind. Four furry paws upon my foot. This is the equivalent of a pika/human embrace. I guess after watching me relax and drink solo, the little fella reckoned. “This guy looks like he could use a hug.”

Is it any wonder I like pikas a lot more than many people? (Ignore my ugly toes.)

Curious people wonder how I can get the Pikas to come so close without feeding them. Answer: It’s the hat. They know I’m on the side of the underpika. 

For further readings about my interspecies love affair with Ochotona princeps.

https://jeffsambur.blogspot.com/2024/09/this-is-psa.html

https://jeffsambur.blogspot.com/2025/07/hi-im-jeff-i-like-hanging-out.html

https://jeffsambur.blogspot.com/2023/08/chapter-two-as-i-ponder-paucity-of.html

May the Powers of the Pika be with you

Jeff

PS. I’ve been off Facebook since January 2026 in a protest against the Tech Twerps. If you enjoyed this post, please feel free to pass it along. 

As far as the manipulating media of what Facebook really is. I suggest reading “Clever People.” It’s an expose from a former insider of FB. Spoiler Alert! Zuckerberg really is a socially inept nerd.

Lastly! Here’s an innovative way for Mountain Studies Institute and the Pika Patrol folks to raise $ for pika research. From the New York Times.

https://www.nytimes.com/2026/07/25/science/ucla-marmot-onlyfans-research-onlymarms.html?smid=nytcore-ios-share

But really Lastly!

My at home Shrine to my fur baby buddies.

The Year of Living

​Undemocratically.

Whew! What a POS political 365 plus days it’s been. 

Everyday the angst level is similar to the Cuban Missile Crisis minus the Red Terror threats of a nuclear war. If there’s a silver lining it’s this. At least theirs no schoolchildren skittering under their desks in a lame attempt to ward off a Soviet atomic blast. Ahhh! Those were the days when our foes were of the international variety. 

How quaint. 

No. Now many Mericans have a legitimate fear of another foe. Our own Federal Gobment has been weaponized against its own citizens. ICE, the National Guard and the Department of Injustice are at the beck and call of one deranged Master/Dictator. 

So here we are. One year of chaos, “whats it to ya” corruption/graft  and the coming of a New Imperialistic World Order which won’t be very orderly. This is what 77,303,568 of our fellow Mericans voted for. They were deaf to his “I only want to be a dictator for one day.” October 6th, 2024. (one month before the Black Tuesday Election). Well, guess what? One day of dictatorship wasn’t enough for this aberration of a human. 

Some of the years notable lowlights. 

A) Pitiful Pardons. The worst? The approximate 1600 J6ers who terrorized members of Congress as they were performing whats usually a peaceful transfer of presidential power. All the while assaulting the U.S Capitol Police in a carnival like atmosphere. “Hang Mike Pence!” 

Lest we forget! The pardoning of the former Honduran President Juan Orlando Hernandez convicted of being a major drug trafficker. 

So much for proclaiming to be a law and order and “tough on drugs” president.

B) The deification/martyrdom of Charlie Kirk in the wake of his assassination. #47 and company going so far as to  order Old Glory to remain at half mast for a week. All for a shock jock White Hypo-Christian Nationalist without a pause button when it came to spouting incendiary remarks about the races and women. 

Many Americans had their careers terminated for telling it like it is. Mr. Kirk was no Saint. Thereby showing First Amendment rights only pertains to the MAGA gang. BTW. There’s a new Turning Point infiltrating our Nation’s High Schools. The organization is named “Club America.” The reason? It’s never too early to indoctrinate the youth of Merica to create a new generation of White Hypo-Christian Nationalists.

For a more in-depth look.

https://jeffsambur.blogspot.com/2025/09/an-open-letter-to-my-fellow-dems.html

C) The hostile takeover of the Kennedy Center for Performing Arts. The insult to injury was debasing the edifice with a horrible new name. Trump Kennedy Center. This did not go over well with patrons and performing artists. Ticket sales have plunged with 43% of the tickets going unsold. (Source: The Guardian).Performers hit the exits as if the theatre was on fire. The latest? The Washington National Opera. 

I feel for the uncultured Board of Directors. Here’s my suggestion for MAGA friendly programming. Bring back reruns of “Hee Haw”, “Duck Dynasty” and the “Jerry Springer Show.” And of course, a “Best of the Apprentice Festival.” 

D) The Shit Stirrer in Chief wasn’t content to limit his maniacal power grab to its own citizens. No President Scumbag decided to go International in a BIGLY fashion. First the “double tap” assaults on Caribbean boats supposedly conveying mucho drugos. If you’re keeping score 115-123 humans were blown up without an oars worth of evidence. Details! Details! Details! If you’re wondering what a “double tap” assault means. It’s this. The first fighter plane performs the initial attack on an unarmed vessel. The second jet takes out the survivors. As we all know “dead men tell no tales.”

Then the raid on Caracas for an international hostile takeover of dictator Maduro. Sure he was an evil leader who terrorized his people (like #47) But there’s plenty of those around. Using trumped up drug trafficking allegations, Delta Force swept in and grabbed the bad guy and his wife. But alas, it was never about the drugs or democracy. It was always about the oil. 

As far as Greenland goes, to paraphrase the infamous “Access Hollywood” tape. “When you’re a star, they let you do it. You can do anything…Grab ‘em by the Greenland!” 

Well, the insanity continued with Hitler Light (so far) announcing the International “Board of Tyrants.” The countries who signed up  are mostly autocratic or strongly Far Right on the political spectrum. The one time membership fee of $1 billion. Guess who’s the self appointed Mafia Don will be! I’m sure Graft Inc.will get a cut of the action after threatening the despots with an “offer you can’t refuse.”

As tensions and tariff threats soar, our former Allies are certainly shaking their combined heads, all the while venting WTF! In their native tongues. 

E) The attack of the Ice Stormtroopers. There’s been a lot written about the murder of Minnesotan Renee Nicole Good. I’ll sum it up this way. In the time it took Ms. Good to shift from reverse to drive. Asshole Agent Jonathan Ross decided to morph into Judge BANG! Jury BANG! and Executioner BANG! His last RIP words of disrespect was calling the still warm corpse a “Fucken Bitch!” Clearly Jackoff Jonathan is a recent graduate of the Trump University of Impunity. Rule of Law and the Constitution don’t apply to the MAGA mayhem loyalists. 

When Dastardly Don needs a Fox Fear Network TV Time Out he hands off the outrage of the day rhetoric to his Cabinet of Cruel Clowns and Advisors. Pete, Pam, RFK Junior and Kristi (AKA all hat no cattle) for a quotable lie.

BUT! The Chosen One whom I scorn the most is the Deputy Chief of Gestapo Staff Stephen Miller. In his own vile words. 

However I believe this rant is plagiarized from the original Nazi instead of a neo-Nazi. 

 “One is either the hammer or the anvil. We confess that it is our purpose to prepare the German people again for the role of the hammer!”

“We will dash anyone to pieces who should dare hinder us in this undertaking. Our rights will be protected only when the German Reich is again supported by the point of the German dagger!”

Stephan you are no mensch. I’m sure your Jewish ancestors would have volunteered to be gassed at Auschwitz before seeing you arrive alive in this country. A pox on you for your hypocrisy. 

Folks! We are now living in a Madman’s dystopian reality TV show broadcast all over the world 🌎. I for one vote for a “You’re Fired” cancellation. 

If this doesn’t happen I predict “a great big beautiful coup.” 

https://jeffsambur.blogspot.com/2025/12/i-think-of-my-mother-often.html

Where’s the Demon of Death when you need him/her?